Fears and Needs

I am very ready to see JP, but I'm not sure if he is entirely ready to see me. Because of this, I am a little afraid to see him. I'm afraid that it is going to go poorly and that we aren't going to have a good time with one another. I'm afraid that it is going to be all about the problems we have instead of just joining together to celebrate coming back together to love one another. I'm afraid that we will get into a fight and the relationship will end. I'm afraid that JP will end our relationship. I'm afraid that it will go back to being the same. I'm afraid that JP will not want to put the necessary effort into our relationship. I'm afraid that we won't want to work together. These are just some of my fears. There are so many things that I am afraid of, but I'm trying not to let the fear rule me.

I'm trying to let my excitement take over and just have a good time with him. I've missed him A LOT and I have wanted him in my life. There are so many things that I have experienced on this break that I wish I could have shared with him. I want to share my life with him. I want to travel the world with him. I want to build a family with him. I want to own a home with him. I want him as part of my family and I want to be a part of his family. I want to love him. I want to hold him. I want to kiss him. I want to be fucked and fuck him. I want to see him smile. I want to wake up next to him. I want to make him delicious and nutritious food. I want to help with the hurt. I want to bring happiness in his life. I want to give him the world! I love him so much! I just want our first meeting to be wonderful and meaningful. I want it to start out on the right foot.

In order for our relationship to progress and become stronger, I need a few things. I don't think that it is much to ask and I feel like they are very important to a strong relationship.

1. I need to feel loved, cared about, wanted, and important, and not feel avoided, neglected, or emotionally cheated upon
2. I need full open and honest communication and I need to feel like he is not hiding things from me
3. I need us to trust one another and not see things in black and white, which cause us to jump to conclusions

I believe that all of these needs are reasonable and not too much to ask. These will make sure that I am stable so that we can make our relationship stable. I hope that JP will be willing to rise to the occasion and meet these needs. I think that all of these needs will be met if we work TOGETHER to strive to make our relationship great again. I guess that I need us to be on Team JP and Sean. We need to be in it together and aim to beat whatever comes our way.

I'm ready!